THE ORIGINAL SIDE OF ME


I don’t know why I’m even writing this. It’s been months since I really put my heart on writing. When I’ve started this blog, I thought that my passion of writing has taken me to a new level. Everything was good in the beginning, but as days passed, the determination went down. I wanted my articles to be helpful. I wanted my articles to be interesting. And last but not the least, I wanted my articles to have content. I don’t know about other writers in the world, because as far as I believe, the articles people write come from their own experiences. My life is different. Yeah, you may say that everyone’s life is different from others but, what I meant is that even when people have their own, different lives, they’ll have things in common. And this applies to me very rarely. In fact, it was the choice I made. I chose not to live like everyone. In everything my fellow people do, I wanted to be different.

Yes, being different is not a gift, it’s a choice. I enjoyed this difference in the beginning but as time passed, I started to realize. People like to talk to people like them, they don’t like to mingle with other kind of people. Or at least, they won’t be so close to them. This made me far from many people, or at least it made me feel I don’t belong there. When you want to prove your uniqueness, you need to be different. And when you want to be different, you lose somethings. This is life, or at least, my life. We all know that even if many differences persist, we are all the same. But that feeling inside, will not let you accept it.

I write things for students. I suggest, I warn, I teach, but sometimes I can’t follow what I say. And then I’ll ask to myself, “It’s you who wrote them, and you can’t follow them?” That question is not wrong. All the posts below this one in the blog are written by me, and I read them now and then because even I need some inspiration at times. Almost a year ago, I wrote an article on overcoming stage fear, but even now I cannot speak in front of five people, standing before them. And I thought that my post on overcoming stage fear did not work and wanted to remove it off the blog, but a friend said that the same post helped him give his first seminar in the college. So, what does it prove? I write, but I cannot receive it. It’s like a movie making. A director does not feel the story because he already knows that the people are ACTING in the movie. The writer knows the content and the concept of the article. So he doesn’t care. And that is why my own posts bring no effect on me. I’ve learnt this.

I said that I’ve got a feeling that I don’t belong to the others. That made me an insecure person. I cannot express things as they are when I talk to people. I cannot ask. I cannot even ask permissions. I don’t know what runs in your mind when I say this but, I was unable to ask permission to write an exam in the college, and lost my percentage by half. My friends just went, they asked, they wrote. And it was too late by the time I got my guts to ask. This is because of the environment I lived in. This is because the choices I have made. And I have learnt this in my life: For every choice you make, you need to pay something.

I know that my college mates and school mates are going to read this before the world reads. I just have one thing to say to you guys: You may be thinking that there’s no point in writing all these things to the world. But I wrote this just because I wanted to share. I can’t speak, so I write.

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THINGS ARE ABOUT TO CHANGE A BIT


Inspiring speeches, uplifting thoughts from others, suggestions, warnings, cautions, do this, do that, don’t do this, don’t do that… I am now fed up of these things. I have realized that things are easy to say, but it does never feel the same when we do them. It is easy to say, “I love you.” But showing that same love in action is not as easy as saying. I know it because I have experienced it. Not in the case of love though, but I’m talking about the difference between saying and doing.

Long ago in this blog, I have posted an article on ‘Overcoming Stage Fright‘, it had a very good response, and a friend said it helped him a lot and he was able to give his seminar in the college very effectively. But you know what? I am the one who posted it, it’s been months, even now I have the stage fright. I’m not posting the link of that article just because I’m not proud of it. And that’s what I mean when I say, “Saying is easy” Now I have decided to DO them and they say. Saying is not those do’s and dont’s, but I’ll just say what happened and what I have done to face it, and that’s all.

‘Cause ain’t no body wanna hear those do’s and dont’s. So I don’t wanna say ’em. Things are gonna change a bit folks!

THIS IS WHY MOST OF THE STUDENTS DONT STEP AHEAD


In the last article I said that students got used to former definitions and rules and are unable to think about the logic and meaning behind every definition. Even if they get the meaning behind it, and redefined the terms which make perfect sense, they don’t put that out. I confess that I cant put that out too. Not in speech, but I write about it. I love writing, and I don’t speak much.

ARE STUDENTS REALLY ACTIVE TODAY?

You may think that most of the students are so dynamic and like an open book, who express every idea they’ve got in mind. This is because only those students came into your notice. But there are many students who don’t express their ideas even if those ideas make a lot of sense. Such students have many questions in their mind. What if I cannot explain in properly? What if I cannot prove it is right? What if… and so on. All these questions come from only one thing, that is fear. They are afraid of facing the circumstances. Even if there is no meaning of being afraid, they are afraid. Every new step someone takes is a combination of excitement, fear and curiosity. Even if it is safe, they are afraid.

YOU CANNOT OVERCOME UNTIL YOU FACE IT

I just want to confess one thing. I was not able to express my ideas too. As I said earlier, I write every article out of my own experience. This fear was my experience too. Even today I cannot speak out about my ideas and thoughts. So I chose to write. I didn’t write about it all these days because I was sorting things out. I tried to know the exact reason of this feeling. Finally here I am, with an answer. This was because you were afraid of the consequences. But let me tell you, almost every new thing that came into existence came out of someone’s risk. There is no better example than this: Jesus Christ who is now able to take away the sin of the world had to hang on the cross 2014 years ago. He faced the risk to bring the freedom. All that I wanna say is that you need to face the fear of risk to overcome the risk.

WE ARE NOT MACHINES. WE ARE HUMAN BEINGS.


What would you answer if I asked you what you’ve done until today right from the moment you took birth, or at least from the moment you started thinking? Do you have an answer? If it is, are you sure you’re satisfied with what you’ve done? If you asked me what I’ve done in my life, I’d say that I discovered myself and helping others to discover themselves so that they may also help others, this chain shall continue. That is actually my concept of opening this blog.

YOU NEED TO KNOW YOUR VALUE

First of all I would like to tell you what a robot does. It receives the information or instruction EXACTLY as the operator gives it, and works according to the commands given by operator. It does nothing more that what the programmer coded it to do. Now coming to yourself. This is especially people who read things by heart and write them in the examination, and finally forget what they’ve written. Did you know what you just did? You took the information as given in the book, and just applied copy-paste method. Even machines do that, much accurate than yours. Now let me ask you, What have you done so far in your academics, in your student life, that machines can’t do? Don’t include emotional things here, I’m asking about your studies.

I HATE DEFINITIONS. AND IT HELPED ME.

Let me give you an example. Long ago, when I first heard the definition of computer, the teacher said, “Computer is an electronic device which is capable of receiving information in a particular form and of performing a sequence of operations in accordance with a predetermined but variable set of procedural instructions (program) to produce a result in the form of information or signals.” You want me to tell the truth? I hate this definition but I love computer. So I redefined the computer as I understood. “Computer is an electronic machine which is built by human to provide assistance in faster and accurate calculations.” That’s it! The definition is over. It’s mechanism and working procedure comes in the explanation. And this change of definition brought out hidden talents out of me.This redefinition let me think, “Why cant I program softwares that solve my own problems?” And finally that brought interest on programming languages and I’ve started coding my own programs.

STUDENTS HAVE GONE POWERLESS

I think you have already heard that students can easily change the world. But let me tell you, you cannot do that. Yes, you cannot do that until you change yourself. I’m writing this with a pain in my heart. This is our generation. I don’t want to let us go meaningless. I want you to think. I want you to understand what you are reading. I want you to bring new things out that no one has ever noticed. Let me tell you the truth. I love the students but really hate it when they perform this copy and paste process. And this is only possible when you start thinking about what you read.

A JOURNEY WITH NO DESTINY


paul prakash My friends always used to say that my story deserves to be a book or  a movie. They actually told that for fun but I took it seriously. I was looking for the most interesting part of my life to write an article. I suppose that most of you people have a question in your head: “What would it be like when we run away from home?” So, here I am to say that I’ve experienced the answer of this question.

The intro goes like this: The first thing I hated in my life is the education system. I hated it when parents asked me about marks, not the subject. I still remember the people who asked my percentage. I cant even remember at least one person who asked me what I know in the subject. Eventually I started hating to stay at my home. I felt like getting rid of this, wanted to get out of that place. I didn’t want to stay at home anymore. I was waiting for right time, planned already.

All set for the start:

That was Sunday morning, around 11 AM. Only my sister is at home with me. She gave me a glass of milk to drink, I was drinking, and in the meanwhile, I was writing ‘sorry’ in a book several times. I also wrote a note addressing my first crush, that I’ll miss her a lot and then put it in my pocket. Glass empty, and I was waiting for the right moment. I went out casually, took my bicycle and said, “I’ll just go hang out with friends and come back for lunch.” I left, but didn’t come back on that day.

  A journey with no destiny

I already had a plan to get out of home, but never thought of where to go. I said to myself, “I’ll go anywhere the roads lead me, but first I have to get rid of this house.” I finally got out of home that day. But the most interesting thing is that I didn’t have a rupee in my pocket on that day. I was about 14 years old when all this happened. I started to follow the traffic. Finally I was on the highway. I was cycling for hours. I thought of ending the journey here for this day and look for some shelter. After some time I happened to see a board, Bharat Heavy Electrical Limited(BHEL) written on it. I thought it was some electrical industrial area, where they produce electricity. Then I saw traffic getting in. I found it interesting and went inside. It was a community. I kept on cycling but I was not able to find anything hopeful. I thought of getting out of that place, but don’t know why, I was stuck inside for hours. I wasted about 3 hours searching for exit. Don’t know what made me stuck inside for so long, what’s in BHEL that stopped me for so long? Wait for the answer. Well, after three hours, I got outside. I had excitement of freedom on one side, fear of future on the other side. Above all, I was tired and thirsty. I stopped and asked for water here and there. Some of them treated me like a beggar. That hurt.

Dark and dangerous:

It was already so dark, large trucks rushing on roads with great speed. Some of the drivers are drunk. I was afraid, but continued. As I went on, I saw people sitting in different cabins, the trucks stopped by them, and these people take money from the drivers and open the gate. I didn’t know what it was, thought that these people are checking the trucks. I stopped there and watched all these things, and a man came to me and asked what I wanted. I left he place immediately without answering him. I wanted to know where I was. I looked for the name of area on shop’s banners or boards, or whatever they call them. Finally I got to know that I was in Patancheru. I felt like heard this name somewhere. That familiarity made me feel like I can be easily caught if I stay there, so I moved forward. And I started again from there and kept cycling, After reaching some distance, there were no on the road, I couldn’t see anything, it was a national highway. Something told me it was not safe when it’s dark. So I thought of sleeping somewhere at the market place.

Was that a kidnap?

All the day away from home, it was so easy to spend. Now I need some shade to sleep. I don’t know where I can. Finally I found a place, parked the cycle on the other side of the road and slept on a platform before a shop. After some time a guy came to me in the middle of the night and woke me up. He asked me who I was and said, “It’s not safe here; the police may come here on patrol. I’ll show you a place, you can sleep there.” I had no other way but just trusting him. So I went with him and he gave me two options. One: abandoned temple, two: abandoned home. The temple was so terrific, so I chose the house. He checked all my pockets before leaving, but he found nothing with me. May be he supposed that I’ll carry money with me and thought of grabbing them from me. He said that he’ll bring me something to eat and went away, but didn’t return for so long. I thought something may be wrong with that place. He might be planning something. How can a man in the middle of night promise me that he’ll bring food for me at that time? Why will he check the pockets? All these questions made me flee that place again.

I got my first job:

Finally came to a closed hotel and tried to sleep on a bench. A man came and asked me who I was. Then I created a fake character and added a story to it. He asked me if I could work in their hotel, then I said yes. He took me to his home and I slept there that night finally. They gave me a blanket and let me sleep with the family. On the next morning they took me to their hotel and I started working for them. I didn’t know what I was doing, but finally I ended up here. I was not able to focus on the work, and people saw my strange behaviour and thought that I had some mental problem. I remember the moment when they looked at me strangely. Regular costumers of the hotel were asking the supervisor who I was. He kept saying that I lost the way and ended up there. But I was not satisfied with it. I didn’t come this far to clean tables.

Home, sweet home:

It’s the evening on the same day, and I still remember the moment when I was sitting on a bench and started thinking what to do next, suddenly all my past came into my mind, all at a time. I broke down and started crying inside. Immediately I took out the money a costumer gave me as a tip, went to the payphone and called my dad. Dad asked me whether I know the place but I don’t even know name of the place. Finally I saw boards on the shops and learned that I was in Sangareddy. Finally, I spoke to dad and called him to pick me up. That moment was inexpressible. Whatever you do, wherever you go, home is home. By the time I cut the call, I don’t even know where they came from, the police surrounded me. They took me to the police station and let me sit there until my parents come to take me. I waited for 3 hours may be, then my dad came to me. Sorry, I can’t explain that moment in words. I leave it to your imaginations. I saw his eyes as red as blood. That’s the only thing that I remember right now. They took me back home on the bike, and my cycle was kept in the police station. I’m home finally.

Impact of the journey at school:

I got to know what happened after I went missing at home. Parents went to school and inquired of my friends about my whereabouts. And the most embarrassing thing is that my mother told principal that I ran away because the homework was too hard for me. School staff started showing pity on me and they never punished me for my pending works thereafter. Anyway, thanks to mom!

I DISCOVERED MYSELF

I didn’t know what I was doing until I ended up right where I’ve started. Anyways, I learnt many things in my journey. All that I’ve noticed is that, everyone followed things which their ancestors or seniors set before them. They got used to the rules of ancestors. Most of them are looking at what education has brought into existence, I appreciate it. But they are comparing education of those days to education system of this generation. They got used to the definitions of seniors, they got used to the rules set by ancestors. That is why I’ve said earlier that you should stop following definitions and start following opinions in the article Bring out the hidden treasures. This is when I thought, “I cant be like everyone. If I was like everyone, what’s the meaning of my existence?” I’ve decided to choose my own way. I discovered myself.

MR. ENTER BUTTON TOLD ME ABOUT PEOPLE!!!


The moment I realized it, I just felt like, “Wow!” I was so excited to share it with you people. But it took some time to think of some good message to add to it. As you readers know, every post on the blog has some message associated with it. This time I brought to you a message that came out of a question raised by our most familiar, Mr. Enter Key. “But what is the specialty in an enter button that everyone is so familiar with? What did the key tell him while no one else didn’t ever notice?” So many questions in your head, right? Alright, alright, no time to waste, let’s get to the point.

I happened to see an image on facebook very long ago, there the button says,

“Dear user, I do appreciate your kind attitude towards the keys on the keyboard, But I just have one question. Why do you press all keys softly but hit me with all your power? Yours sincerely, The Enter Key.” 

Okay, Mr. Enter Key. that was a very good question, and I got the answer.

Let me first define the enter key in my own words. “Enter key is a key on the keyboard, which is generally meant to take the user to the next step.” People around the world are always excited about what would happen next. Unfortunately, the most common button on keyboard that takes the user to the “NEXT” is Mr. Enter Key. (Sad for him). The question he asked made me realize what we users were doing all the time. Seriously, his question opened my eyes. We generally hit the enter button so hard because we’re excited about the next. In my earlier article, Satisfaction may be trouble, I wrote that when we are satisfied, there may be a chance of becoming lazy. In the same way, when we are excited, there is a chance of over expectations. And when the outcome didn’t reach the expectation, you’re upset. The way you press the enter key plays a role in defining your way of reaction too!

What’s the point actually?

Our subconscious mind is always active and it does the background processes. When we hit an enter key, we don’t generally focus on it so much, as we are already used to it and its a routine process. But the subconscious mind is active here. It acts according to your own nature at the moment you hit the enter key. Just to make sure, you can observe this in your own way of pressing the button. When you press the enter button for next line while you’re writing a paragraph, you won’t hit the button so hard, because you’re still in the same document. On the other hand, you’ll hit the button hard on the last step of any installation. Noticed? There is the answer. You won’t be so excited while pressing enter to get into next line because you’ll be in the same document. But when you’re about to complete an installation, you’ll surely be excited about the software you’re installing.

We get to know about ourselves when we observe our own reactions and behavior in little things. All that I wanna say is to watch yourself at the time of taking next step in your life. When you are over excited, you expect too much. When you expect too much, you get upset. When you get upset, the day is bad. As simple as that. Apply it in your daily life, you’ll definitely see the change. And hey, don’t forget to comment. Your feedback makes me write better. bye-bye. 🙂

P.S. Mr. Enter Key, hope you got your answer! 😛

BRING OUT THE HIDDEN TREASURES


So far the articles were about various aspects of one’s life. We discussed about how we can face a problem to overcome it. Now let us put those things aside. We have many sources to find such solutions. But now, this is the time to discover ourselves. This is the time to bring out something out of us. This is the time when we’re going to extract the talents that God has put in us. Let’s do this now. Now or never.

If you really want to bring the hidden treasures out of you, don’t get used to the things that come out of someone else’s treasure.

Let me explain. Don’t look at things as someone else defined them, instead look at them according to your opinion. Then that opinion will be your definition. By this, you bring out things in your way, and at some point, you’ll define a new thing like world never knew. The same thing the world kept seeing from centuries, would be something new and interesting when you involve into it.

Who knows? The next generation may read about you in history books! Who knows? The next generation may learn the things you introduced! Who knows? You may change the whole world with a new idea.

this NEW IDEA concept which changed the world only comes when you look at things as you are.

When you understand things as your elders taught you, you get no new idea, as that thing you learnt from them was  their idea. Stop doing it. Observe things as yourself, put your own meaning to it. (let it be meaningful indeed 😛 ). Then you will be able to apply your own ideas to terms you observe. And a new idea may come from all these observations and your own opinions.

And when you finally put all these observations, opinions and ideas together, my friend, you will be able to discover something new that is beyond wildest imaginations.

And finally, you get to know what you are. In the mean while, the world knows what you are. As a conclusion, all that I wanted to say is, “Don’t follow people’s definitions, instead follow your own opinions.”